As an astrologer I have certain advantages over an average citizen of the world. I can track the up and down cycles of my life and study them. When bad things happen to astrologers they have charts and graphs and books they can pour over that give them answers to many of life’s trickier questions. At the very least, we can see when a particularly harrowing time will have an end. That is, until that old devil Neptune comes a calling.
I was born with a fairly tight opposition between my Moon and Mercury in my natal chart. The natal chart Moon is primarily someone’s feelings and emotions.
That is: what and how you feel about things, how you process those feelings, your intuition, your empathy, the irrational side of you and how you find and cultivate your own feelings of security in an insecure world. Other themes that orbit around the moon include your subconscious and anything to do with females, (mom, and women in general) just to name a few.
On the other hand, Mercury represents the mind. What we think about, how we think about it, what and how we talk about, and communication of almost any kind.
Neptune is currently stomping on them both in the form of a square. It isn’t pretty and since Neptune moves very slowly and with the orb I use I could be in this situation for a few years. In short, I have a long way to go. Neptune’s influence on any planet is soon felt in the form of loss, even futility. Neptune “erodes” “fogs up” and “dissolves” much of the foundational strength and understanding you may have spent a lifetime building. In this case it is my feelings and emotions and my mental processes, like thinking and communicating. That’s all.
So, how does that feel? Well, it feels awful. First you start feeling unsure about yourself. The insecurity comes from the fact that your usual mode of operation (M.O.) is not working anymore. Either because other people are challenging it or you can’t find it. Suddenly the things that used to inspire you or conversely, tick you off just aren’t anymore…HUH? What happened? Or, in the current vernacular: WTF? Whatever Neptune is touching, the planet and all it represents, begins to get erased to a certain extent. Then because you aren’t sure anymore what is “what” you look outside of yourself for some indicators, loose your boundaries and end up confusing what others think or feel with what you think or feel. You say things you don’t really mean and take what other people say wrong as well. Grand hi-jinks ensue and not the fun city kind. Nothing is as you thought it was. How could you be so stupid, blind, naïve etc.?
A very disconcerting vulnerability descends on your psyche.
You walk around uncharacteristically crying and when people ask you what the trouble is, you may have an answer, but you know that if things were normal you wouldn’t be this upset. You just can’t handle what you used to handle and you don’t know why. You get touchy and depressed. What is the point of it all? If I survive this week that will come in the form of part two.